This memorial that you have arranged for us today allows us as a family to come together and do honor to the memory of our grandparents. My grandfather wanted to be remembered. He asked for this. When I became interested in our family history and approached my father with questions, he brought out a box of letters, written by his parents. In his last letter, my grandfather wrote "don't forget me."

The lack of normal mourning rituals and the inablity to mourn has been a burden for both the living and the dead. This memorial stands in place of the funeral my grandfather never had, as most victims of the Holocaust did not have a funeral.

This memorial is also an occasion to make a connection to a living Jewish community. Remembrance is a social process. Nobody remembers in isolation. We remember in the presence of others. This breaks the isolation that is an extension of the original trauma, a problem that all survivor families suffer from. Bearing witness is one way to reintegrate with the living. It triggers memories and in turn creates new memories.

I would like to say something about being a child in a survivor family. My generation has inherited the trauma of the Holocuast, whether we like it or not. How this happens is not well understood. Most likely it happens on many planes, physical, emotional, psychological, and spiritual. Healing becomes a generational process.

Some people draw on the story of the Exodus for meaning. When Moses led the children of Israel out of Egypt they wandered in the desert for forty years. In forty years a new generation is born, and it is this generation that enters the land of Israel, because they can imagine a future without the trauma.